Player: @Spawn of Santa

Character Bio

What is that?! It's...a man!

The fires of a gazillion toaster ovens seem to emanate from his very body! This cannot be!

Behold! Even the darkness itself seems to obey his every whim! It's as if he had secretly caught The Darkness masturbating on film & now threatens it with blackmail lest The Darkness does what he says!

These abilities go far beyond the realm of the impossible to the very core of the UNpossible!

Alas, he must be legally blind for his poor fashion sense seems to convey the very epitome of all that is fantastically crappy in clothing today.

That's it! From this moment on, this...."man" shall henceforth be known as....

UnpossiblyCraptastic!!!

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